Personal Growth and Counseling Center

Those who experience homesickness might notice an increase in depressed feelings, anxiety, obsessive thoughts and minor physical ailments. Homesickness can often be distinguished from depression in this way - people that suffer from depression find that both, university and home life, are awful; in homesickness, university can feel awful while home may seem more comfortable.

Some students will start by being mildly depressed and anxious several weeks before leaving home, in anticipation of the impending change. Others will be fine initially, and then to their surprise find themselves feeling homesick later in the academic year, perhaps after the winter break, or even at the start of their second academic year. But commonly it is the first few days or weeks after arriving at a university which are the most difficult.

Students are not immune just because they have successfully experienced leaving home before. Vulnerability to feeling homesick is affected by:

• The distance from home.
• A sense of anticlimax at finally arriving at a university after working towards it for so long.
• The student's role in deciding to come to university.
• Unhappiness due to expectations of university not being met.
• "Job strain" - i.e. work overload and low control over it.
• The happiness and health of family members at home.

Students that are homesick often feel they have little control over their environment and that they are not identified with it or committed to the university or their place in it.

There are two tasks involved in starting at university:

1. Leaving familiar things, people and places.
2. Adapting to new things, people and places.

Students have different levels of tolerance to change and have learned different ways of coping with new situations. But what can make transition so hard? In a familiar place people generally feel accepted and secure, and are therefore able to function and meet challenges successfully. Away from the familiar, they are without their usual sources of support, and in unfamiliar surroundings their tried and tested methods of coping and working are challenged; "failure" looms large and self-esteem and confidence drops. Tasks which would normally have been taken in one's stride, can suddenly seem quite a challenge, or even feel impossible.

1. Talk to someone. If you haven't yet made friends here, consider student activities & interest groups, religious/spiritual communities, etc. Counseling may also be helpful for ways to becoming more connected with others.
2. Keep in good contact with the people you have left behind; arrange a time to go back to see them, perhaps after a few weeks. But also give yourself time within the university to begin to get involved here. Don't let looking back actually hinder moving forward.
3. Encourage visits by friends and family to come and see you in your new setting when possible.
4. Remember that many other people are experiencing similar feelings, although you may assume that they are doing fine! (You can't read their minds - just as they can't read yours!)
5. You are allowed to feel sad and homesick. You are also allowed to enjoy yourself - it isn't being disloyal to those you miss!
6. Be realistic about what to expect from student life and from yourself. Establish a balance between work and leisure: you are NOT expected to work ALL the time - you would soon burn out. On the other hand, if you don't put in enough time on work, you can very quickly get behind, which only adds to the stresses!
7. Look for academic resources on campus if work is proving too difficult, can you improve your study skills or your organization of time and work so that you gain satisfaction from what you do?
8. Get enough food and sleep. Healthy nourishment fuels us and sleep promotes resiliency. These affect us emotionally as well as physically.
9. Make contacts and friends through shared activities such as sport or other interests. There are so many clubs and societies within the university and city, that you are very likely to find something that suits your particular interests. At the start of the academic year many new people will be joining - you are unlikely to be the only new person.
10. Give yourself time to adjust. You don't have to get everything right straight away, nor do you have to rush into making major decisions about staying or leaving.
11. Make sure that you do really want to be at college and have responsibility of fulfilling your academic obligations at this time. Most people come through times of homesickness and go on to do well and enjoy their time at university. But for some it may be appropriate to take another direction, which may include leaving the university. Those who do leave mostly find another course or university with which they are happy, perhaps after taking a year out. But if you are thinking along these lines, you need to take expert advice about the academic, career and financial implications. Speak to your academic adviser, a career adviser, and/or mental health counselor.
12. Seek professional help either from your primary care physician or the Counseling Center if you stop being able to do normal social and academic things. Don't wait until the problems have grown impossibly large to handle or resolve.

We hope that some of these suggestions will prove useful. There are many things you can do to help yourself, but don't hesitate in seeking out the help of others. Homesickness is not unusual - and it can be conquered!

As always, if you're feeling homesick and you still need more support, the counseling center is available for students. Call and make an appointment!